Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
my mouth tastes like poor choices
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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