He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
the gays at disneyland are vicious
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
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