Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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