Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
High School Students Hilariously Rank Celebrities By Their Stank For Class Project
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
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She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...