Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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