You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
