God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
my shit smells like andre
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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