Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
My breasts were aching with rage.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
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