I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
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