fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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