Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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