so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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