Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
