I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Randomize