There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
someone get that fucking seahorse.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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