He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
