I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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