Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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