I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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