at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
where are my pants?
in the oven.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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