i think i have herpe
just one?
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Randomize