Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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