I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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