Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
