what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
My cat gives me a boner
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
