they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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