champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
She's the barista slut.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
