Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Randomize