I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
