I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
i just ordered a pitcher of margaritas for me and a friend but she called and canceled. oh well, looks like im getting trashed alone.
the waiter who hardly speaks english told me "i go get your medicine now"
this medicine is soooo good.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
