I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Randomize
