After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
