it's too hot outside to masturbate.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize