So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
