i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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