Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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