your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Randomize