Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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