North Korea, Best Korea!
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
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