Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
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