Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Randomize
