hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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