I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize