I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
