Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
