R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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