yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
