I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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