Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
