She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize
