my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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